I wanted to publicly thank those of you who have made this hard time a little easier.
I have LOVED and greatly appreciated all of the sweet comments you have left here for me to read!
They have lifted me at my hour of need!
Thank you for coming here and "being with me" as I tried to tread through this loss.
I have felt comforted and continue to feel a sense of peace.
I also wanted to name a few people who have gone above and beyond.
Holly....thank you for thinking about me and helping me through this via phone.
You have been with me through so many things....much sadness and many joys!
Thank you for being one of my greatest supporters!!!
Aimee...thank you for allowing me to invade your life by endlessly asking if you can pick up kids from school and let them hang at your house.
Thank you for the beautiful outfit you bought Ashanti...it is darling!
Thank you for allowing me to cry on your shoulder.....I hope I didn't get you too wet. ;)
I am so thankful you are my friend!
Bethany....thank you for calling me and asking how I am and listening to me bawl on the phone.
Thank you for the warm meal and the beautiful picture frame.
I can't wait to put a picture of all of us in it!
You continue to show me compassion and I am amazed by your caring heart!!!
Thank you for being a special friend!
Lisa...thank you for calling and checking on me and for thinking I am something special. You know how to lift me up when I am low! Thank you for the frame...I love it and can't wait to use it!!! Thank you for always being there just when I need you!!! I miss serving with you!!! I learned so much! I am so grateful you are my "sister"!
Kim...Thank You for your sweet words of comfort.
I know you know how it feels to be me!
Leisha....Thank you for coming and taking pictures of all of us on the eve of Ashanti's new adventure!
I am so blessed to have a friend who would come and share her talent with me so readily and willingly!
I can't wait to see them!
And yes I would love a girls night sometime soon!
All My Friends in our Ward....thank you so much for your love and support!!!
There are so many of you I can't name you all..thanks for being there for me and for the meals!
FSA Friends...Steve, Shanna, and all of National Board...thank you for supporting us!!
Thank you for the prayers and hugs!!
We love serving with you guys!!!
Jill Johnson...one of my favorite DCFS workers...I love you!!
Thank you for showing me us so much support!!!
Thank you for thinking of us when you got the call for a tiny baby girl....I am so glad she came to us!!!
Thank you for being there when I need to talk!
You are amazing!
Scott Weaver....ok where do I start?
Thank you for thinking so highly of us and doing all you can to help make it a little easier! Thank you for finding support for us...especially for me!!
I know you will help no matter what I ask!!
Thanks for being a great RFC!
Tricia Jensen....my instant friend!
Thank you for your online support!
I know you are just a phone call away and
I appreciate how easy it is to be your friend!!! :)
Emily Helm...thanks for being an wonderful case worker!
I appreciate all you have done for Ashanti and for me and my family!
You made our experience a very positive one!
If only you could be the case worker for all the cases we might have!
My Mother.....THANK YOU CUTE MOM!!!
I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't come and saved me from myself!!
Thank you for doing endless loads of laundry and for cleaning my messy kitchen!
When I couldn't function you took over and make a huge difference!
Your presence in my home allowed me to get out of my "bad place" and start to move forward with my grief rather than sit in it and cry!
You always save me....what would I do with out you?
Diane.....thank you for checking on me.
Thank you for helping me sew the baby room projects and for just being my "cup of call".
I know you understand what I have been through and I am so thankful you have been there for me...hoping and being sad along with me!
I love you big sis!
All of our Family...thank you for loving Ashanti and supporting us as we have fostered.
We hope you will continue to love the children that coming into our family...even if they don't stay!
I know saying goodbye was hard on the Grandparents too!
But what a lucky baby to have been loved so much by so many!!!
Brad....thanks for excusing the messes....I can't tell you how much I appreciate your patience with me as I have tried to find my way through this.
Of everyone..you understood why I wasn't functioning because you were struggling too!
You are awesome!!!
I just don't know how I got so lucky!!!
My kids...they have been great through all of this.
My girls have developed little "mothering" skills and have learned so much!
I am so happy with you guys!!
Thanks for being such great foster siblings!!
Stephenie Meyer.....I know she will NEVER see this post
BUT
I wanted to thank her for her books.
As transitioning was happening I was reading "Breaking Dawn" and as we had to say goodbye I was re-reading "Twilight".
There is nothing like escaping into another world...especially when my own reality hurts!
So THANK YOU Stephenie for your brilliant mind and sharing your talent with so many!
There is another I want to thank...He who has carried me each day and wiped away the despair.
I couldn't do this without my Savior!
I am so grateful for the love He continues to give me and for buoying up my Spirit in my time of need!
I have had many people say "I don't think you should do this again".
I understand why they say it...they don't like me to feel pain because they love me.
But if I had listened to those same sentiments before I would never have known my favorite baby!
The pain in goodbye was worth the 8 months of knowing her!
So the answer to the question
" Are you going to do this again?"
is
YES!
It is part of why I am here!“Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.”(Mark 10:14)
I have LOVED and greatly appreciated all of the sweet comments you have left here for me to read!
They have lifted me at my hour of need!
Thank you for coming here and "being with me" as I tried to tread through this loss.
I have felt comforted and continue to feel a sense of peace.
I also wanted to name a few people who have gone above and beyond.
Holly....thank you for thinking about me and helping me through this via phone.
You have been with me through so many things....much sadness and many joys!
Thank you for being one of my greatest supporters!!!
Aimee...thank you for allowing me to invade your life by endlessly asking if you can pick up kids from school and let them hang at your house.
Thank you for the beautiful outfit you bought Ashanti...it is darling!
Thank you for allowing me to cry on your shoulder.....I hope I didn't get you too wet. ;)
I am so thankful you are my friend!
Bethany....thank you for calling me and asking how I am and listening to me bawl on the phone.
Thank you for the warm meal and the beautiful picture frame.
I can't wait to put a picture of all of us in it!
You continue to show me compassion and I am amazed by your caring heart!!!
Thank you for being a special friend!
Lisa...thank you for calling and checking on me and for thinking I am something special. You know how to lift me up when I am low! Thank you for the frame...I love it and can't wait to use it!!! Thank you for always being there just when I need you!!! I miss serving with you!!! I learned so much! I am so grateful you are my "sister"!
Kim...Thank You for your sweet words of comfort.
I know you know how it feels to be me!
Leisha....Thank you for coming and taking pictures of all of us on the eve of Ashanti's new adventure!
I am so blessed to have a friend who would come and share her talent with me so readily and willingly!
I can't wait to see them!
And yes I would love a girls night sometime soon!
All My Friends in our Ward....thank you so much for your love and support!!!
There are so many of you I can't name you all..thanks for being there for me and for the meals!
FSA Friends...Steve, Shanna, and all of National Board...thank you for supporting us!!
Thank you for the prayers and hugs!!
We love serving with you guys!!!
Jill Johnson...one of my favorite DCFS workers...I love you!!
Thank you for showing me us so much support!!!
Thank you for thinking of us when you got the call for a tiny baby girl....I am so glad she came to us!!!
Thank you for being there when I need to talk!
You are amazing!
Scott Weaver....ok where do I start?
Thank you for thinking so highly of us and doing all you can to help make it a little easier! Thank you for finding support for us...especially for me!!
I know you will help no matter what I ask!!
Thanks for being a great RFC!
Tricia Jensen....my instant friend!
Thank you for your online support!
I know you are just a phone call away and
I appreciate how easy it is to be your friend!!! :)
Emily Helm...thanks for being an wonderful case worker!
I appreciate all you have done for Ashanti and for me and my family!
You made our experience a very positive one!
If only you could be the case worker for all the cases we might have!
My Mother.....THANK YOU CUTE MOM!!!
I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't come and saved me from myself!!
Thank you for doing endless loads of laundry and for cleaning my messy kitchen!
When I couldn't function you took over and make a huge difference!
Your presence in my home allowed me to get out of my "bad place" and start to move forward with my grief rather than sit in it and cry!
You always save me....what would I do with out you?
Diane.....thank you for checking on me.
Thank you for helping me sew the baby room projects and for just being my "cup of call".
I know you understand what I have been through and I am so thankful you have been there for me...hoping and being sad along with me!
I love you big sis!
All of our Family...thank you for loving Ashanti and supporting us as we have fostered.
We hope you will continue to love the children that coming into our family...even if they don't stay!
I know saying goodbye was hard on the Grandparents too!
But what a lucky baby to have been loved so much by so many!!!
Brad....thanks for excusing the messes....I can't tell you how much I appreciate your patience with me as I have tried to find my way through this.
Of everyone..you understood why I wasn't functioning because you were struggling too!
You are awesome!!!
I just don't know how I got so lucky!!!
My kids...they have been great through all of this.
My girls have developed little "mothering" skills and have learned so much!
I am so happy with you guys!!
Thanks for being such great foster siblings!!
Stephenie Meyer.....I know she will NEVER see this post
BUT
I wanted to thank her for her books.
As transitioning was happening I was reading "Breaking Dawn" and as we had to say goodbye I was re-reading "Twilight".
There is nothing like escaping into another world...especially when my own reality hurts!
So THANK YOU Stephenie for your brilliant mind and sharing your talent with so many!
There is another I want to thank...He who has carried me each day and wiped away the despair.
I couldn't do this without my Savior!
I am so grateful for the love He continues to give me and for buoying up my Spirit in my time of need!
I have had many people say "I don't think you should do this again".
I understand why they say it...they don't like me to feel pain because they love me.
But if I had listened to those same sentiments before I would never have known my favorite baby!
The pain in goodbye was worth the 8 months of knowing her!
So the answer to the question
" Are you going to do this again?"
is
YES!
It is part of why I am here!“Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.”(Mark 10:14)
4 comments:
Brenda,
It was so good to see you at Boondocks! Its sounds like you are doing better or at least faking it until you make it. Thats what it takes sometimes! Hope we can get together for lunch one of these days. Hang in there!
Heidi
DO IT AGAIN!! After watching you go through this, it makes me want another placement. If this year hadn't been SO hard...we would have another placement with us. Hopefully in the new year. My heart and prayers are continually with you. Loves Brenda.
You help me so much by reading your blog. I do not have a blog myself but I have left you a comment before. I too have a 8 month old baby boy right now and I really do not know how I will let him go. I love him as if he were my own and I cannot imagine him leaving. So thanks for all your comments and for sharing your experince it really helps.
Paula
Paula,
Thank you for your comments! I hope that whatever comes you have comfort. Please email me if you ever need support or a listening ear. I hope the best for your little guy!
Hugs!
Brenda
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