Silence

I have many feelings today.
Unfortunately because they are dealing with an ongoing FC case I cannot speak of them.
So I suffer with worries in silence.
This is the one thing I really hate about FC...the silence.
I am called an advocate yet I have no voice.
I am called a Mother and yet I have no say in their care once they leave my home.
I am told how important I am to these children and yet in the courtroom I feel like the enemy...
yet
I cannot defend myself against claims made by those who have had their child removed from them.
I suffer in silence.


On a happier note.....
Lil' Edward is doing great!
Things look to be winding up and he will be on his way to a more permant situation.
It has been neat to watch how positive things can be.
I am happy for him and his parents!
AND
They said I will still get to see him....I might even get to babysit.
That makes me happy!

I am a bundle of feelings today and tears come easily.
I will get through it all....I have gotten good at that since I get lots of help from up above.
Thanks for listening as I find my way through the foster care system.
The emails you send me and comments you post saying how I am helping you....well they help me.
It reminds me that I am not alone.
I am not the only one who has felt these feelings.
That knowledge helps me gather strength to fight the good fight.
I know what I am doing is part of who I am.
Today it just feels kind of hard.
I am hanging onto the knowledge that the Lord steps in where I can't.
Thanks for listening.